A romantic comedy presents an idealized version of interpersonal connections. However, individuals frequently confuse the indicators of limerence with those of love. In this article, learn more about intense limerence signs that may come across as romantic.
When dating for the first time, emotions tend to be more intense. You’ve reached an all-time high and simply must have more time with the other person. Yeah, I get that; it happened to me too.
Limerence, on the other hand, transforms a love attraction into a pattern of obsession. Changing or maintaining a strong emotional connection is the aim. You are not coercing yourself into doing this. Most cases of limerence are not intentional. An individual with limerence typically wants nothing more than to be acknowledged for their own profound emotions. In this context, limerence becomes a potential problem.
LIMERENCE’S MOST PROMINENT OBSESSIVE SYMPTOMS
Your worst fear is being emotionally dependent and preoccupied with the prospect of having your feelings returned. But don’t worry; it’s healthy to consider the possibility that your emotions aren’t love.
1. It is long-term.
I am totally serious. Limerence is a condition that can last for years. To be honest, I think I had limerence in high school. For a full six years, I had a crush on this one particular guy. Those emotions lingered for quite some time. Even worse, the guy was sending me contradictory signals. Instead of speeding things up, it only slowed them down.
2. The success of limerence is not sustainable.
To love someone is to take pleasure in the other person’s success and fulfillment through mutual pursuits and activities. However, true love cannot exist in the presence of limerence. All that matters in the realm of limerence are winning over the heart of another. It’s irrelevant whether or not they like you.
3. A lot of your daydreams involve them.
Whether or not you’re dating this individual, you can’t help but think about them often. You fantasize about spending the rest of your life with this person and what kind of relationship you will have. This daydreaming is, of course, keeping you from focusing on the real world.
4. In the case of limerence, it’s more than just a crush.
Moreover, it goes beyond a simple crush. Limerence amplifies the effect. A crush or infatuation is a strong emotion, yet it doesn’t last forever. However, limerence symptoms might linger for quite some time, and the person’s emotional state will be more volatile, with greater swings between extreme states of happiness and sadness.
4. You can find them wherever.
Everything you encounter on the job or in everyday life triggers memories of them. Nothing you see doesn’t make you think of them. This may sound sweet, but even the most committed couples have blind spots.
5. There’s no sexual orientation requirement or anything like that.
Now you see why so many people become confused. Sex isn’t the root of limerence; that’s lust. More so than a need to gratify a sexual urge, limerence is motivated by a desire to be noticed by the thing or person you have affections for. Therefore, sex is not a factor in limerence.
6. You overthink things.
Okay, I’ll admit that I’m as guilty as the next person of reading too much into the acts and words of a romantic interest. You can’t automatically label it as limerence if you’re an overanalyzer. However, one of the symptoms is doing too much thinking. It’s getting a little obsessive if you’re trying to draw connections between their every sigh and utterance and how they feel about you.
7. They have become your ideal partner in life, your soulmate.
They are the one, whether you’ve had a soulmate before or not. You conclude that this closeness stems from the fact that you feel drawn into their own being. You have only a cursory familiarity with this person.
8. You make things happen so you can be with them.
You research their workplace and “accidentally” end up there. When you want to be closer to someone, you’ll resort to manipulating them. One of the most prominent indicators of limerence is the inability to resist the need to manipulate situations in order to get that person closer to you.
9. You realize that you essentially require them to survive.
Perhaps you experienced something similar when you ended your first serious relationship. You probably asked yourself, “How am I going to survive without them?” Never again will I be lucky in love. Eventually, though, you will find someone to love and go on with your life. A person suffering from limerence experiences extreme anxiety and an insatiable desire for the love and approval of others around them.
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